Still in the womb
You thought you had left the womb behind but this was very much a lie. You left *a* womb, yes, but not wombs altogether. You came out, covered in blood, severed from your physical mother, but now the womb you inhabit is one of ideology, religion, whatever. You were forced out of one womb, and clambered willingly back into another! Your umbilical cord is made invisible to you for habit, but look down at your belly and see it; handle it with your clammy paws and make it real in your mind. You are submerged in all manner of juices, fed from outside of yourself. Sadly, the gender-non-specific parent carrying you is probably hitting the booze and fags quite hard, so all of that information colouring the world view you have already decided to maintain could well be poison. Who knows? (and the one who knows, should they care?)
This is not a one-child-per-tummy job. You are joined by millions of people submerged into the same idea (or their version of it perhaps, but they will have a lot in common with you). Some of your fellows you can see, some of those people are abstract numbers on the internet or occupying some distant geography, some of those people are heroes who wrote books about this idea. Nonetheless they are all made real by your clutching after them.
Everyone else is unthinking. And they must be unchoosing, for they have not chosen what you have chosen. Remember that the neo/nouveau/pretentious jargon-womb must be climbed into; you cannot end up in an ideas belly by force; it cannot wrap tentacles around you and suck you through its gender-non-specific genitals! Thus, the strength of other people outside your womb is misled and becomes a blight on the meta-narrative of humanity; everyone else outside of your idea is an unthinking enemy to be feared. Those brainless not-you's are powerful springs pulled back by habit and animal desire, and they will burst out and lash whatever they strike. Poor fools (go and save them ye evangelists).
You think that because you entertain the possibility that you are imbibing intellectual poison that this somehow vindicates you of any chance of being wrong - token resistance! What exactly are your real motives for believing in a "better" world? Dare to find them if you will: Guilt, weakness, fear - these things colour your utopian discourse. Guilt for being born on the right side of the tracks. Weakness for not being able to compete with powerful men (who do not question but merely act and devour anything in their path). Fear of what would happen if you were actually able to take power; fear of responsibility (sneering guffaw!).
Still, it's more dignified to be a foetus than a worthless sceptic. I don't know about you, but I'd much rather be...still in the womb! (punchline)
By Selim 'Cynical Bastard' Talat
